Tuesday, August 4, 2009
Forgive and Forget, or Forgive and Remember?
The old saying, forgive and forget, has been around a long time.
Is that a good thing? Is that the emotionally healthy thing to do?
I was thinking about this the other day, and I decided that forgive and remember is a better philosophy to live by. Why is that?
In a nutshell: if you forgive and forget, you might not learn all that could be learned from the situation.
But, if you forgive and remember, which is much harder, think of all you can learn.
If I encounter a hurtful situation and forgive the offender but remember, maybe I could learn:
• How not to be an offender in a similar situation
• Figure out why I was hurt by the offense and use it for growth
• Learn how to respond better when being hurt
These thoughts remind of a book I read years ago entitled Don't Waste Your Sorrows. I think that capsules what my thoughts are around this subject.
As I continue my journey through life, I want to forgive and remember. That's a very hard balancing act like walking a high wire. If I start leaning too heavily on the remembering side, I could fall into bitterness. If I start leaning too far on the forgiving side without remembering, I could fall into being gullible and deceived.
Isn't life a wonderful adventure? Learning and growing that keeps going, kind of like the pink bunny.